Over the Christmas holiday, my mom and I used our awesome girl power to repair one the toilets in my house, and managed to break it even more.

My girl power did a happy dance because I didn’t have to reseat the tank. I just had to hire a plumber to replace the now really broken toilet.

Which I did an excellent job of avoiding until last week.

I called a plumbing company that had good reviews on Angie’s List and had to pick out the toilet I wanted installed. From thousands of options. Do I want one with a higher seat? Or a round or extended seat? What about water conservation? Do I want a low flow tank?

Uh, I want a white one that flushes. It’s in my guest bathroom. It only gets used a few times a year.

So we get the nitty gritty details of the white toilet that flushes worked out, and T will install it on Wednesday. At 8 AM. And he’ll call me 30 minutes before he will get here.

He calls at 7 AM and has a radio announcer voice. Seriously. Every time he spoke I wanted to ask him why he was a plumber and not on the radio. I’m pretty sure he thought I was weird because I had to stop thinking about why he wasn’t a DJ somewhere before I answered him.

But he shows up without the toilet I selected from the list of thousands of options. Oops.

And it’s raining, and he’ll have to drive to Marietta in the rain and rush hour to get the white toilet that flushes that I selected from thousands of options.

I call the plumbing company to let them know their plumber didn’t bring a toilet.

There is an art to complaining. You have to read the person you’re talking to. In this case, it was the very nice woman I had spoken to earlier in the week and who had guided me through the thousands of options to select the toilet the plumber didn’t bring. So I just explained what had happened and joked about the whole process we’d gone through to figure out what I needed.

She called me back later with news that I was getting an upgraded model and T would pick out a really good one for me.

T come back with a fancy high-seated low-flow model super-duper toilet. He still sounds like a DJ and doesn’t have a plumber butt-crack. He’s actually really cute.

He gets everything installed, and does some test flushes to demonstrate the super-duper flushing.

You know what? Low flow toilets sound like they are burping when they flush.

And some previous owner of my house painted that bathroom brown.